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Tales from the Land Manatee

My life as a cautionary tale.

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Tag: Houseguest

Blame It on the Mongolians

On March 21, 2023March 21, 2023 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor, Uncategorized5 Comments

'How bad can I screw up Mongolian chicken?' I thought to myself before initiating my latest man-made disaster.

Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

On May 21, 2022March 3, 2023 By Sean D. LaytonIn Humor8 Comments

The older I get, the weirder my sleep pattern gets and it's causing some issues.

Tormented by the Human Bloodhound

On March 17, 2020 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor15 Comments

The Houseguest has been a great roommate -- except for when she's a pain in the ass. Like when it comes to certain smells -- like pot pies.

I’m Tired of Being Abused by Cox

On November 14, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor12 Comments

Despite the innuendo, click-bait title, and juvenile humor, there is a decided lack of porn in this post. Just me being abused by my crappy ISP. Again.

The Houseguest is Going to Kill Me

On October 26, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor4 Comments

Ever know you've screwed up? Like really bad? Like someone told you to do something and you said yeah, yeah, you would take care of it — and you meant to — but you just didn't get around it because, well, you just didn't? This is one of those times.

Did My Post Office Slip Into a Parallel Universe?

On October 23, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, HumorLeave a comment

So, the Houseguest kept bugging me to mail her early voter ballot to her. Trips to the post office never end well — but what else could I do? So off I went.

Adventures in Supergluing

On October 4, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor10 Comments

So, I superglued my hands together. Again. Yeah, that's right — again.

Every Land Manatee Has Its Day

On August 29, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, HumorLeave a comment

Ever have one skill that you practiced ceaselessly for hours on end until you perfected it? But you never had a chance to use it. That was me — until today.

Shopping Hell: Round 2

On August 17, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor8 Comments

Nothing makes me break into a cold sweat like the thought of going clothes shopping. Yet there was no getting around it — it was time to go to the mall again.

Finally Took a DNA Test and Yep, I’m Human (More or Less)

On May 31, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Human Interest, Humor2 Comments

I've always been fascinated by history and genealogy, so it's been somewhat ironic that I know so little about my family history. So I ordered a DNA test to see what kind of genetic surprises might be hiding in the Layton woodpile.

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About Sean Layton

Born in the UK, I have lived most of my life under the blazing Arizona sun. Okay, that’s a lie, I’ve been sheltering in the air-conditioned indoors. Anyway, I’m a starving writer with an MFA in creative writing (screenwriting & fiction) from ASU.

After attempting to amuse my friends for years with Facebook posts, I decided to make my tales of woe and musings on life in my tiny universe available online for an even larger audience to ignore (at their own peril).

If you enjoy what you read here, be sure to follow and share!

Recent Posts

  • Blame It on the Mongolians
  • Luckily the Dead Aren’t in a Hurry
  • Age Is Just a Number (Especially in My Family)
  • Top Gun: Maverick — Worth Seeing?
  • Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

What others call poor decision making, I call teachable moments.

Now step back a safe distance and watch and learn.

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© Sean D. Layton and www.thelandmanatee.com, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sean D. Layton and www.thelandmanatee.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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  • Do Women Influence Men Positively?
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