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Tales from the Land Manatee

My life as a cautionary tale.

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Category: Humor

Blame It on the Mongolians

On March 21, 2023March 21, 2023 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor, Uncategorized5 Comments

'How bad can I screw up Mongolian chicken?' I thought to myself before initiating my latest man-made disaster.

Age Is Just a Number (Especially in My Family)

On March 3, 2023March 9, 2023 By Sean D. LaytonIn Humor8 Comments

It's hard to keep track of your own age, never mind someone else's.

Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

On May 21, 2022March 3, 2023 By Sean D. LaytonIn Humor8 Comments

The older I get, the weirder my sleep pattern gets and it's causing some issues.

Yep, I’m a Whitey

On May 17, 2022May 18, 2022 By Sean D. LaytonIn Ancestry, Human Interest, Humor20 Comments

So Ancestry.com just added a new feature where they breakdown your DNA profile by parent contribution. Time to see what surprises Ancestry.com had in store for me.

Bad Blood

On April 30, 2022April 30, 2022 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor, Uncategorized10 Comments

I got a blood test earlier in the month. The good news -- I have plenty of it.

The Neighborhood Death March

On April 27, 2022April 28, 2022 By Sean D. LaytonIn Humor6 Comments

I really hate exercising, even walking. But sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, right?

Time for Hot Love(birds)

On August 28, 2021August 30, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn birds, Houseguest, Uncategorized19 Comments

So what do you do when you end up with birds with heat exhaustion? Provide them air conditioning and a misting system, of course.

Finito! It’s Gone

On August 15, 2021August 16, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Humor12 Comments

I finally had to admit that my long hair looked awful most of the time. It's glory days were thirty years in the rearview mirror, and now I looked like the crazy guy you don't want to sit next to on the bus. It was time to take drastic measures.

Update: Pandemic Hair

On April 19, 2021April 19, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor18 Comments

We're one year into the pandemic crisis and, according to some, my hair has also become a disaster.

The Universe – or Someone – Has It in for Me

On April 12, 2021April 14, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor18 Comments

I don't know what's going on -- but strange things are afoot at my local Fry's Grocery store. Either I have rotten luck -- or the Universe has it in for me.

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About Sean Layton

Born in the UK, I have lived most of my life under the blazing Arizona sun. Okay, that’s a lie, I’ve been sheltering in the air-conditioned indoors. Anyway, I’m a starving writer with an MFA in creative writing (screenwriting & fiction) from ASU.

After attempting to amuse my friends for years with Facebook posts, I decided to make my tales of woe and musings on life in my tiny universe available online for an even larger audience to ignore (at their own peril).

If you enjoy what you read here, be sure to follow and share!

Recent Posts

  • Blame It on the Mongolians
  • Luckily the Dead Aren’t in a Hurry
  • Age Is Just a Number (Especially in My Family)
  • Top Gun: Maverick — Worth Seeing?
  • Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

What others call poor decision making, I call teachable moments.

Now step back a safe distance and watch and learn.

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© Sean D. Layton and www.thelandmanatee.com, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sean D. Layton and www.thelandmanatee.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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  • Do Women Influence Men Positively?
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