Well, if you came here looking for information on sea cows with terrestrial ambitions, my apologies. Nor is this a site devoted to fat shaming.
No, my site exists to (hopefully) tell amusing or insightful anecdotes, share information about things I find interesting, and to display some of my creative writing.
So why The Land Manatee then? Well, my snarky gay brother Kevin was always in shape while I, on the other hand, hated working out. As my girth steadily increased, Kevin started introducing me to his friends not as his big brother but as his larger brother. (Did I mention he was snarky? Yeah, it was like living in an episode of Will & Grace 24/7.) Somewhere along the way, he hung the nickname The Land Manatee on me.
Gigantor was also popular. And Tubbles. Regarding non-weight-related nicknames, I have to say Butthole was probably my least favorite followed closely by The Former Super Model Known as Farah Fawcett. He used to introduce me to his friends by that one when I had really long hair, which he hated.
Now, I could have called my site
but her estate could possibly have sued me. And I imagine www.butthole.com was taken long ago. (At this point, my legal team strongly advises against Googling it). However, an out-of-water manatee seemed like an apt metaphor for the awkward situations I periodically find myself in, so www.thelandmanatee.com it is!
Today, I eke out a living as a starving writer (good for the waistline, not so good for a balanced diet and preventing scurvy). I am prone to making questionable decisions, which makes my life a casual spectator sport for my friends, though, on the plus side, it gives me something to write about.
Anyway, if you enjoy your time here, drop the occasional comment and hit the Like button on posts you appreciate so I can write more about what you want to read. And follow my blog to get the latest posts!
Yours truly, The Land Manatee.
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