My life as a cautionary tale.
My keys were missing. Magically, mysteriously gone. The problem was, I was already driving when I realized it. I'd just left the house after 8 p.m. to do a couple of hours of Ubering and was driving down Sossaman toward the 60 when I realized they were missing. Compulsively, I had just patted my front …
How a lack of toilet paper is indicative of the eventual doom of the human species. Before I launch into my day of indignity, I just want to say that I hate to tell you, but as a species, we're doomed and there's no way around it. The culprit? It's not climate change; it's not nuclear …
Just in case you're here for salacious reasons due to the title, I don't want to disappoint you with a bait and switch. Truth in advertising, nobody gets blown in this blog post. I was doing my Uber run the other day. I figured I'd take a different tack by starting early to get a …
So why is the site called The Land Manatee? Well, my brother Kevin used to be a fitness freak. He ran marathons, which I always thought was a terrible idea. (“Why does my knee hurt?” — “Probably because you just ran 26.2 miles would be my guess”). He was always in shape then, good looking and women threw …
*Grumble grumble* F*cking WordPress. So my friends keep bugging me to write a blog to share my anecdotes or random musings. I don't know why my increasingly infrequent Facebook posts are inadequate for that purpose, but what the hell, I built a website on WordPress the other day for freelancing purposes (okay, technically it's still …