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Tales from the Land Manatee

My life as a cautionary tale.

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Help! I’ve Been Poisoned!

On April 1, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Humor, Rideshare3 Comments

When we were kids, my mom always told us to never take candy from strangers. But she never said anything about a full meal.

City Maenad

On March 20, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Other Artists, Writing2 Comments

This piece is written by Basilike Pappa, a Greek poet I like.

How Not to Burn Your House Down

On March 16, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Human Interest, Humor3 Comments

So the Persian New Year known as Nowruz is almost here. Are you excited? Yeah, I didn’t have it on my calendar either, but the Houseguest asked me to help her mark it with a simple fire ceremony.

Rolled hundred dollars banknote, two lines and a pile of meth on black background, closeup

Sample Chapter from Sean Layton’s Book

On February 26, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Human Interest, Sean's Non-Fiction, Writing13 Comments

Here is a chapter of the memoir I've been working on dealing with my brother's addiction. Hope you enjoy it.

The effects of eating asparagus by the panful

Man versus Asparagus

On February 21, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor, Musings5 Comments

Being a single guy and cooking for yourself is tough — at least it is if you're me — unless you consider baking a shitload of asparagus to be cooking.

There’s a Robot Out to Steal your Job

On February 18, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Human Interest, Humor, Musings2 Comments

Is it me or are robots stealing our jobs? Seriously, they're starting to crop up everywhere. They even have robot prostitutes. Where does it stop?

Size Matters

On February 14, 2018January 23, 2021 By Sean D. LaytonIn Houseguest, Humor1 Comment

Women frequently say (to men anyway) that size doesn't matter. But size matters. It always does.

The Hollywood sign

Making Life Decisions — Flash Fiction

On February 12, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Flash Fiction, Sean' Fiction, Writing2 Comments

A piece of flash fiction for your enjoyment. 'Mike rolls into L.A. His hatchback, his hermit crab shell, is packed roof high...'

Ridin’ Dirty — The Crips Story Part 2

On February 8, 2018April 25, 2023 By Sean D. LaytonIn Blasts from the Past, Humor7 Comments

Our story to this point: When last we saw our intrepid hero (me), things were going poorly for him, and he was on his way to "meet the rest of the Crips" — though not voluntarily.

Last Seat — Flash Fiction

On February 6, 2018 By Sean D. LaytonIn Flash Fiction, Sean' Fiction, Writing4 Comments

Trembling over her, afraid to touch, Marcus never saw her face. Her chestnut hair is what he’ll remember. And the crimson nimbus of blood spreading across the asphalt. She had barely squeezed into the last space ahead of him. The tail car of the accelerating trolley, snapping around the corner, flung her carelessly from the …

Continue reading Last Seat — Flash Fiction

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About Sean Layton

Born in the UK, I have lived most of my life under the blazing Arizona sun. Okay, that’s a lie, I’ve been sheltering in the air-conditioned indoors. Anyway, I’m a starving writer with an MFA in creative writing (screenwriting & fiction) from ASU.

After attempting to amuse my friends for years with Facebook posts, I decided to make my tales of woe and musings on life in my tiny universe available online for an even larger audience to ignore (at their own peril).

If you enjoy what you read here, be sure to follow and share!

Recent Posts

  • The Land Manatee Takes on the Long Arm of the Law
  • I’mmmm baaaaaaackkkkk!
  • Surviving the Scorching Heat: Tales from the Bird Spa.
  • Blame It on the Mongolians
  • Luckily the Dead Aren’t in a Hurry

What others call poor decision making, I call teachable moments.

Now step back a safe distance and watch and learn.

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© Sean D. Layton and www.thelandmanatee.com, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sean D. Layton and www.thelandmanatee.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Follow Tales from the Land Manatee on WordPress.com

Top Posts & Pages

  • How (Not) to Fix a Broken Beard Trimmer
  • Should I Downgrade My WordPress Plan?
  • How I Gained a Mexican Mom
  • The Disappearing Spanish Girl
  • I'mmmm baaaaaaackkkkk!
  • Living as a Cartoon Character
  • The Transformation Continues
  • In Need of a Pandemic Haircut
  • Attack of the Mutant Guinea Pig
  • Murder in the Backyard
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