The only thing more discouraging than having to shop at Walmart is having to ask for help.
The only thing more discouraging than having to shop at Walmart is having to ask for help.
I think people use terms incorrectly because they're lazy — or just to annoy me.
People say air plants are supposed to be a hassle-free and hard to kill. I just want to go on record and say I didn't take it as a personal challenge to prove them wrong.
When someone wanted a ride, I felt the pressure to cave. How was I going to get out of it?
I was kind of worried how my readers would react when I posted a couple of poems. Turns out my friends might be a bunch of poem haters.
When they say "This opportunity could change your life," usually they mean in a good way.
My car, when it's clean, is on Nature's shit list. Literally.
I'd always wanted a guinea pig when I was a kid, but it never happened. Then in grad school, I ended up with the mutant guinea pig from hell.
When my beard trimmer stopped working properly, I decided to take things (and a screwdriver) into my own hands and get it running again.
You know, sometimes I'm too witty for my own good. It's something I had to learn the hard way.